Do you?

What is it you want from me?

Do you want my heart? Do you desire my love? Do you want me to want you in a way that is real?

Do you want my touch? Do you want a tangible thing soft skin and gentle lips? Do you want wet and tight and slick? Do you want me on top, underneath, behind? Do you want me to caress you, to hurt you, to feel all of you and say you are beautiful?

Do you want the domination? Do you want me to tell you to act on every fantasy you ever had in a way that pleases me? Do you want to show me yourself in these acts so that at last someone understands, no accepts, this part of you?

Do you want my smile? Do you want that part of me that laughs and jokes and teases? Do you want to see my eyes shine from the joy that is an open heart? Do you want my friendship, it is a gift that flows easily from me. Offering this never diminishes me, but rather the offering of it will always make me more, never less.

Do you want to make me happy? Not for you, but for me. Do you want to ease my aches, offer me your concerns, make my life better? To offer me this gift from you is a rare and precious thing.

Do you want to offer the same to me? For if I can give to you and ease your life, it brings me pleasure too. Do you want to allow me that gift of your own vulnerability?

Do you want my passion? All of it, and there is so very much and I need so very much and I want so very much and I will demand and I will give and it will be good.

Do you want just little pieces of me? That is ok, there is nothing wrong with that. You just have to be honest. Ahh, yes, honest. Do you want to be honest with me? Can you be honest with yourself?

Do you want all of me? Can you even fathom what accepting all of a person really is? To open another human up and see it all is not something easily done. To see them not just as male or female, but to see all that makes them, good, bad, ugly, beautiful and to want it all. I understand if you can't as it is a rare thing.

He does, she does, and he there is starting to. It is enough. I am filled to the brim with the joy of it all.

I believe we are different for each connection we make. And yet this does not fragment us for the ability to share and be what another person needs is a wonderful thing. You just have to understand that the whole of you is still there always.

Do you? I do.

Tell Me... #4

Tell Me. Amazing what lovely things get shared with those two words. Weekly... three questions or open ended prompts. Questions open to anyone who stops by to visit, so go on answer and "tell me." You may answer all or just one or two, but you must answer truthfully... this isn't fiction. Write a single word... or a thousand, it is up to you. I would love to hear from you. And we all like to share in the naughty revealed. Remember you can always post anonymous here on my blog if you are shy. I will be posting my reply to my own questions on Friday's before the next Questions go up Saturday morning. So go on now... click the Comments button and ...

Tell me...

• ... about your first crush.

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• ... about your favorite sexual postion.

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• ... about a secret you are ashamed of.

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If you would like to Tell Me anything else the previous Tell Me's.... are over there linked on the side bar answer all you like ------>>>

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Main Entry:
big·ot
Pronunciation:
\ˈbi-gət\
Function:
noun
Etymology:
French, hypocrite, bigot
Date:
1660
: a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices ; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group with hatred and intolerance

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We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

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In 1948, the California Supreme Court recognized marriage as a fundamental right when it became the first state court in the country to strike down a law prohibiting interracial marriage. The California Supreme Court held that:
Marriage is thus something more than a civil contract subject to regulation by the state; it is a fundamental right of free men.... Legislation infringing such rights must be based upon more than prejudice and must be free from oppressive discrimination to comply with the constitutional requirements of due process and equal protection of the laws.

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Proposition 8 - The California Constitution, as amended, would add a new section (Section 7.5) to Article I, placing it between the state Equal Protection clause and nondiscrimination in business and the professions. This new section would read:
Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.

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Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

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I will be voting NO of California Proposition 8
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I will weep when it passes. My God loves all people.

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Update 11/5/08 -
And so... it passed. And I am ashamed of my state, at least 52% of it.

Coloring Me

I really wanted to paint it. Though not sure if it is better or just different. But done is done.

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Following Her Lead - Read by Honey

Rising and Falling

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A dancer leaps through the air and seems suspended, untied for a moment to the invisible strings that keep you and me from leaving the ground permanently, but it is only illusion. An athlete rises up and up to go higher and farther than anyone else on the earth before this moment, but they can not fight what is inevitable. The physics of rise and fall, the rules that say there is no floating for us humans, only up as high as our muscles will propel and then immediately down and down again say to me here and now there is nothing but change.

For every rising there is a fall. For every up there will come a back down again. Change will happen, you can not float on an apex for even a moment. Change will come. Life is the ups and the downs strung together to form the wave patterns of your life. Yet, let me look for a moment at that. For there is an overwhelming want of a real commitment with another, there is desire for a permanence and if there is always a coming back down again from the high is such a thing for a lifetime or any significant time possible?

I say yes. A friend shared with me his theory of friendships. That there is a wonderful high, a whoosh, of early friendship. A high, a rising up of learning about and sharing with, a passion to know another human intimately. And yet that rising will reach its zenith and come back down and find a place that is no longer close to that high. And so I say when the initial rise and coming down again have settled back to where gravity pulls, to the low, it is then that the realness begins. This is when you get to give of yourself in a significant way. That is when you truly care. To share in the mundane moments, the woes and unhappiness that will come as life happens. Friendship or more, lovers or a real attempt at a commitment, it doesn't matter for all relationships, all of life will continue to rise and fall. Some fall so far they are beyond rising again. And so the changes happen. Some are wonderful good, but still the fall happen. Still change happens.

All the time, in moments so fast you are hardly cognizant the rising happens, but you must make yourself aware as that awareness of the moving up will allow real happiness. He brings you breakfast in bed and your heart rises just a little and carries up with it the joy that renews the commitment again and again. She sends you a small email of sweetness that makes your breath come just a little faster and the wave rises again and again. A friend calls to share with you her day, and in return listens to yours, up we go with all that makes a soul feel right. But all of this requires effort. The dancer and athlete know this without thinking, muscles must be used and trained and made to lift a body up and up so that the time in the air is at its maximum. And you and I know this as a heart and soul must be used and trained and made to lift another spirit up and up so that there is a purpose to our lives and that the time spent reaching for the zenith, the peak, the apex is more important than the coming back down.

Yes, it is the recognizing of the rise and the understanding of the fall that allow us to be happy. Knowing that coming down from the peak isn't an end but merely a balance that must be allowed. And too I believe we have hundreds, or perhaps thousands of waves overlapping in our lives in all the moments. Bills and jobs and responsibilities can be up and down but so often feel down, loves and joys and passions are up and down as well and just as predictably feel up and up sometimes in an all consuming manic way. Worries must be balanced with the joys and joys with reality, allow them all to overlap. Let the rising and falling become so intermingled that there is no crushing negative or positive that is overwhelming or blinding, but rather find the balance that allows peace.

Fly high my darling. You will come back down, but I will be there to rise with you again. See them both, live, feel, be them both, the highs and lows, the rising and the falling but find your balance with me.

Muse - A Self Portrait

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I was feeling creative today. We are up in the mountains for the weekend, small town called Idyllwild. So lovely, the leaves on the oak trees are falling and cover the ground. Sitting outside drawing was a perfect way to spend the morning.

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This pencil drawing on 90lbs cream paper was inspired by a photo taken of me... a few years ago. I still have all these curves, they are just a little curvier now. I titled it Muse for H as he makes me smile each time he calls me that. I hope perhaps you might be inspired.
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Tell Me... #3

Tell Me. Amazing what lovely things get shared with those two words. Weekly... three questions or open ended prompts. Questions open to anyone who stops by to visit, so go on answer and "tell me." You may answer all or just one or two, but you must answer truthfully... this isn't fiction. Write a single word... or a thousand, it is up to you. I would love to hear from you. And we all like to share in the naughty revealed. Remember you can always post anonymous here on my blog if you are shy. I will be posting my reply to my own questions on Friday's before the next Questions go up Saturday morning. So go on now... click the Comments button and ...

Tell me...

• ... the naughtiest thing you have done in a car... moving or not?

• ... about when you have passed judgment (specifically or generally) on someone for their desires or actions?

• ... do you exercise your right to vote?

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If you would like to Tell Me anything else the previous Tell Me's.... are over there linked on the side bar answer all you like ------>>>

Sugasm #151

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Blue Moon

Hubby is the best prop I could ever have.

Blue Moon tonight in Southern California.

Cutest tushy in town and now... time to smack that bottom.